Brace yourself; incoming cliche alert, (sigh) …yes everyone is unique! Or at least that’s what loved ones, well wishers and the eternal optimists have reassured us. The truth however is not so convenient which is that most of us are conformists, scared to raise our head above the parapet. This is exactly how our society was designed in order to sustain the status quo, through conformity.
Not many people have been on the journey of individuation and so therefore they lack the insight to understand what makes them distinct from others. Most people are the sum of their environmental programming and therefore unconsciously act out of conditioned responses. There is no freedom when your responses are conditioned; you are merely a product of (conditioned) neurological pathways. The journey of individuation takes commitment and courage, as it takes courage to leave your comfort zones and be who you actually are.
The Courage To Be Unique
It takes courage and personal power to stand out from the crowd and to be different from others. There’s a certain safety in conformity and most people choose safety over uniqueness, which is what authenticity is. Truth be told, everybody is unique but not everybody has the courage to discover what makes them this way.
What truly makes a person ‘special’ is all of the different circumstances and ‘unique’ life experiences that has gone into who they have become since the moment of birth. When we are authentic, that is when we are integrating our ‘unique’ outlook on life and that is when we are now able to be able to demonstrate uniqueness.
Most people approach uniqueness from a purely superficial standpoint i.e. they think it’s something you have to do or be or have or that it’s more of a look than an energy. They may take up hobbies and lifestyles and wear clothing that reflect uniqueness but still at their core they are not sincere, or true to who they are and so therefore lack uniqueness.
To Be Unique Be Authentic
The only, and I mean ONLY way to be unique from others, is to be completely and utterly authentic. Uniqueness is a consequence of authenticity, however authenticity takes a boatload of courage. It takes courage to be yourself, but when you are able to do so, authentic power is born.
People often encourage others to just ‘be themselves’ but what about when you don’t know who your authentic self is? When you have spent years being conditioned to conform, being yourself feels counter-intuitive and that is why we must practice courage.
It takes courage to be yourself in a society that’s primary function is conformity. Being yourself feels a bit dangerous, but that’s part of what makes it fun. Your reward is uniqueness which in turn encourages, inspires and gives permission for other souls to be themselves too.
Being Unique Is More Than An Aesthetic!
Being yourself is more than just an aesthetic, it’s a vibe, a way of being, a way of life. If being individual comes from something outside of yourself, it’s just a mask that you will wear to hide the fact that perhaps you don’t feel that distinctive at all. A person that is truly unique does not have to try, in fact may have actually tried to fit in, or blend in with the crowd.
We lose our identity and all uniqueness when we follow the crowd. And so in the spirit of conformity I will reference this wise saying; ‘don’t be a second rate version of someone else, be a first rate version of yourself’.
That being said, we must consider this insight with moderation as life is a delicate balance of poles. Sometimes it’s beneficial to follow people that we are inspired by, we can model ourselves off people who we are inspired by as we are all inspired and influenced by others. The key is deciding how much we allow others to influence our unique outlook. Sometimes it’s necessary to stand on the shoulders of giants!
Summary!
So summarise some tips to stand out as someone unique would be to:
- Have lots of courage
- Be authentic, No matter how weird, wacky, strange, normal anal etc that authenticity is. The world needs exactly what makes you, YOU!
- Kiss goodbye to the safety of conformity. Dare to stand out from the crowd
- be too concerned with what other people think of you
- Figure out what excites you that is linked to your passion, then pursue that
- Embrace your flaws, they play a big huge part in what makes you unique. Own them
- Being unique may also involve expressing yourself in ways that don’t conform aesthetically, this tip might appeal to the more creative types
- Surround yourself with people who celebrate your unique outlook and minimise contact with people situations and environments that make us shy away from being ourselves
Whilst it’s acceptable and understandable to be inspired by others, it’s very important to take this tip with a pinch of salt by not copying others to the point of plagiarising or thieving somebody’s entire identity (think single white female). Not only is this a disservice to yourself, it can also be quite uncomfortable or upsetting for the person you are copying if they are a part of your close circle. If you’re looking for your gift or purpose in life, being yourself is truly the greatest gift that you can gift to the world.
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